kiibo's blog !!

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- Being Alive
- The Real World
- The Future
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Welcome to kiibopal9617's blog!!
I'm not exactly sure what I'll do with this blog just yet... But I'll find something!!! For now, just enjoy my set up!! I really like how the site turned out :]
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Being Alive - 04/27/23
Ever since I became aware that I was in the real world, life has been a lot different for me. I no longer feel the weight of my protective armor, nor experience the rude comments that came my way for being a robot. Instead, discrimination comes in the way of my gender identity. No, I have not been called a slur or hate crimed, but it's just as hurtful when nobody recognizes me as a man. It felt that way in the past, and now it's all different. Being called someone else's name feels so wrong. Being human feels strange, but it's stranger not being the gender I've associated myself to be for a long time. All my peers saw me that way, my voice and appearance matched accordingly; and now it's all gone. I hope to one day look like how I used to, or at least, look how I want to.

Being Alive - 04/27/23

Ever since I became aware that I was in the real world, life has been a lot different for me.
I no longer feel the weight of my protective armor, nor experience the rude comments that came my way for being a robot. Instead, discrimination comes in the way of my gender identity.
No, I have not been called a slur or hate crimed, but it's just as hurtful when nobody recognizes me as a man. It felt that way in the past, and now it's all different. Being called someone else's name feels so wrong.
Being human feels strange, but it's stranger not being the gender I've associated myself to be for a long time. All my peers saw me that way, my voice and appearance matched accordingly; and now it's all gone.
I hope to one day look like how I used to, or at least, look how I want to.

Other Blogs
- "The Real World" - "The Future"

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The Real World - 05/02/23
Being in the real world and actually existing has proven a tough task for me. Yes, most of my memories involve living just like everyone else, but things are just different enough to throw me into a loop of confusion and muscle memory that never equates to action. One of the things that really solidified the fact that I'm real is being human. So many of my memories overlap, but a constant was me being non-human. As I kept experiencing life this way, I found more memories coming back to me in a phenomenon I really can't explain. One of these experiences was walking into a closet... And having it actually be a closet; no Dark World, no office to meet Vanitas in, no strange room to unlock the secret of the Killing Game. It's so strange. But, as years have gone by, I've gotten used to it. Sometimes I find myself still knowing how to ACT, or where exactly to bite someone for the best blood, or even feeling like I should've been repaired by now. I hope I stop this soon.

The Real World - 05/02/23

Being in the real world and actually existing has proven a tough task for me. Yes, most of my memories involve living just like everyone else, but things are just different enough to throw me into a loop of confusion and muscle memory that never equates to action.
One of the things that really solidified the fact that I'm real is being human. So many of my memories overlap, but a constant was me being non-human.
As I kept experiencing life this way, I found more memories coming back to me in a phenomenon I really can't explain.
One of these experiences was walking into a closet... And having it actually be a closet; no Dark World, no office to meet Vanitas in, no strange room to unlock the secret of the Killing Game. It's so strange.
But, as years have gone by, I've gotten used to it. Sometimes I find myself still knowing how to ACT, or where exactly to bite someone for the best blood, or even feeling like I should've been repaired by now. I hope I stop this soon.

Other Blogs
- "Being Alive" - "The Future"

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The Future - 05/16/23
I graduate in about less than 2 weeks, and I felt really excited because for the first time in several years, I found a path for the future. Whenever I was asked what I'd do when I grew up, or even what job I'd get or what I'd study in college (if I even went), I'd shut down and get stressed. For the first time, I know something I could do. Obviously it'll take me a long time to find something I'm truly happy doing for work, since I didn't really want to monetize my art, it already feels like a chore at times. This career path does have art involved, but I feel like it'll help me take even more liberties with my creativity. Most of it is drained out by making worlds or characters, then having to explain all of it in a story. But the main thing I'm excited about is actually knowing something I wanna do. I've been so indesicive all my life, it feels like a very big step for me. A few years ago, I didn't even think I'd make it past freshman year; I planned to be dead by September of last year for god's sake.

The Future - 05/16/23

I graduate in about less than 2 weeks, and I felt really excited because for the first time in several years, I found a path for the future. Whenever I was asked what I'd do when I grew up, or even what job I'd get or what I'd study in college (if I even went), I'd shut down and get stressed. For the first time, I know something I could do.
Obviously it'll take me a long time to find something I'm truly happy doing for work, since I didn't really want to monetize my art, it already feels like a chore at times. This career path does have art involved, but I feel like it'll help me take even more liberties with my creativity. Most of it is drained out by making worlds or characters, then having to explain all of it in a story.
But the main thing I'm excited about is actually knowing something I wanna do. I've been so indesicive all my life, it feels like a very big step for me. A few years ago, I didn't even think I'd make it past freshman year; I planned to be dead by September of last year for god's sake.

Other Blogs
- "Being Alive" - "The Real World"

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Update Logs
1. Changes to the site: - Added ability to submit comments through a form - Added Update section - Added "Being Alive" blog post - Added birthday countdown - Added Main Page tip
2. Changes to the site: - Added "The Real World" blog post
3. Changes to the site: - Added "The Future" blog post - Slightly changed website layout so blog posts fit nicer into Containers

Update Times:
1. 04/27/23 2. 05/02/23 3. 05/16/23